Aesthetics

One of the things that I'm learning here is how different the Indian view of aesthetics is when compared with the American view. (To clear up any misunderstanding right off, aesthetics: a particular theory or conception of beauty or art : a particular taste for or approach to what is pleasing to the senses and especially sight.) One of the first examples that I had of this was when we first arranged our living room. At first, we had the typical arrangement of the sofa opposite the TV, flanked by two chairs. The "coffee table" that we were provided with was more of the size that I would use as an end table, but it was in the middle of the arrangement. However, once we receieved all of our furniture, Liz and I decided to be a little bit creative with the arrangement. We decided to leave the sofa opposite the TV but put the two chairs separated by the table on the perpendicular wall and leave their opposite open to the room. We liked the open feeling that it gave to the room. We also figured that a rug would tie the whole room together nicely. (Well, we still figure that, we just haven't purchased one yet. :) ) It was interesting to see the Indians react to our arrangment though. Our maid was the most concerned, trying to convince us to move one of the chairs back to the opposite side. Everyone else reacted with quizzical looks at the arrangement or the grudging comments of "I guess this arrangement is pretty ok."

The other instance where I've noticed this discrepancy is in shopping for clothing. I recently purchased a new salwar suit (pants, top and dupatta [scarf]) at Naidu Hall. When I went to try everything on, they handed me the pants and the top, but not the dupatta. I didn't think much of it since I figured that it wouldn't need to be altered like the other pieces. However, AFTER I had given them for tailoring, I noticed the dupatta and thought to myself "I don't think those colors really match." But I went ahead and purchased it anyway and took it home to ask Liz' opinon. She quickly agreed that it didn't match, so I, feeling better about my sense of color, decided to purchase material for one that I thought matched. Then the people at the matching center store [Indian] kept telling me that the colors on the original dupatta were "correct" and I didn't need to find another one. Interesting.

I guess this discrepancy may explain why I was unsuccessful in purchasing material to have another salwar suit made for me. For me, the problems were not only color, but also shapes ("No, the triangles on the top don't match with the paisley print on the pants!" or "Squares and circles just don't go together!") Is this proof that the American aesthetic is completely different than the Indian aesthetic? Or am I just too picky? :)

My First Tamil Movie

Today I watched my first Tamil movie (with subtitles of course) called Minnale (means "lightening".) We decided to watch this one because, apparently, it is more like the Hindi movie format that I'm used to. [For the uninitiated, the basic Hindi movie plot line: Boy meets/falls in love with girl, boy can't have girl for caste/family/previous engagement issue, issue gets resolved (usually through some heroics), boy and girl live happily ever after. It will also include lots of singing and dancing (think 1940s Hollywood musical), a scene with the heroine in a wet saree, and no kissing (unless the couple is married). I love them! :) ]

Minnale did not disappoint. It was wonderfully sentimental ("true love will prevail over all obstacles"). Rajesh, the hero, falls in love with Reena but finds that she's engaged (through their families) to his college rival Rajiv (whom she hasn't met in many years since he has been working in America.) He impersonates Rajiv in order to win Reena's heart. Of course, when she finds out the truth, she wants to have nothing to do with Rajesh even though she has fallen in love with him (after spending 5 days with him.) Every thing gets sorted out in the end (of course!) and Rajiv gracefully bows out of the picture. [In a love triangle, the anti-hero is removed from the situation by either 1.) death; 2.) the discovery that he's really a villain; or, 3.) his stepping gracefully out of the way.]

As compared to a Hindi movie, this movie had less singing and dancing (averaging one song/half hour compared to one song every 15 minutes!) but it had many more choreographed fight scenes. The other thing I found interesting is that it never seemed to matter that Rajesh was Brahmin and Reena was Christian. [In most of the Hindi movies I've seen, something like that in itself would be the issue separating the loving couple (Veer-Zahra comes to mind, although they also had nationality issues.)] But here it wasn't even addressed? Is the South more open-minded regarding this issue?

In any case, I look forward to seeing more Tamil movies during my stay here...

[By the way, for those of you who were wondering about the title, he first saw and fell in love with the girl when he saw her dancing with some kids during a thunderstorm. It was like lightening! :) Although she was wearing a salwar kameez instead of a saree... :)]

A Correction...

In order to clarify, the definitions that I used for kitsch were a combo from urbandictionary.com as follows:

1. kitsch
As an art movement, lifestyle, or literature and film genre, kitsch is pleasingly distasteful. It's melodramatic, overdone, gaudy and tacky or sentimental and folksy. It's so bad that it's cool. Your cat might attack it, but it's hot.And, no, Martha Stewart and Jerry Springer are NOT bad enough to be kitsch. At all. Paris and Nicole though...

and:

3. kitsch
art, decorative objects or design considered by many people to be ugly, lacking in style, or false but enjoyed by other people, often because they are funny.

I personally am not big on flashing lighted things, but I didn't mean it to sound that derogatory...sorry for the confusion... :)

The Search for a Bangle Box...

Poor Raghu. Little did he know what he was getting into when he agreed to take me shopping for a bangle box... :)

Liz and I have been talking about needing bangle boxes to store all of our bangles for quite some time now. Basically, they are jewelry boxes with removable bars, so that you can slide your bangles on them. Unfortunately for some people, this weekend, Liz headed off to do some other necessary shopping with another friend, so I convinced Raghu to take me to look for the bangle boxes. On the advice of a friend of his, we started off at Odyssey. They had leather-covered travel ones, with only one bar (not big enough) and carved wooden ones with two half bars (ditto). Neither was satisfactory or to my liking. We tried several more stores with only variations on the same. I was getting more and more frustrated (as those of you who have been shopping with me can imagine) and despairing that I would ever find what I was looking for. Then Raghu suggested looking at Pondy Bazaar. Initially I was very reluctant to go because it is always SO crowded on the weekends, but he ASSURED me that I would find something different there. And he was right!!!! In the first shop we tried, there was a velvet covered box with three bars that I liked much better than anything else I had seen. We tried a few more shops and found one that had a couple of different varieties and I picked out a similar, red velvet covered one with gold stripes (that Raghu described as too jazzy!) :) But I liked it fine. Yay! I'm so happy I have my bangle box-and I can now describe to Liz (and anyone else) exactly what types are available and where to find each type.

I'm so sorry for doubting you Raghu! :)

New Review

Saturday night I went out with some friends from work to check out a pub called Geoffrey's. My friends tell me that it was the first pub in Chennai. I guess it's a little on the outskirts of town, so it doesn't always get the attention that some of the more "trendy" places get, but it was my kind of place. It is definitely a pub instead of a disc (sp?) so there wasn't even a dance floor. It was more of a "home-town" bar- [Ok everyone hum the theme for Cheers!] :) -with good music (excellent, actually!) and comfy couches and tables around for people to hang out with friends and socialize. They even have a couple of pool tables. My only complaint was that the drinks were a bit on the pricey side...but I'll have to go during Ladies' Night sometime to make up for that! :)

Hmm...I feel like I'm doing a review on places in Chennai now.... :)

Nothing says India like kitsch :)

As I was driving to work tonight, my driver's dashboard was lit up by a figurine of the Virgin Mary in flashing red and green lights. I mention this because it is only too common here in India to see figurines of various faiths flashing brightly from passing cars and because, now that I travel alone to work, I have time to reflect on these topics. :) Actually, it seems to me, decking out your car (especially with some sort of lights) is much more prevalent here than back in the States-though I am sure that the frequency varies culturally and/or regionally there.

Anyway, this guy has been our driver for about a month now and, as yet, I haven't discovered a pattern as to when the figurine gets turned on: is it when the traffic is heavier? when he's sleepier and needs it to stay awake? or, when he decides to pull out into oncoming bike traffic (as in what happened tonight!)? [Let me tell you, I found it comforting to focus on it at that point in time-and I'm not even Catholic!] :)

I think my sense of humor is starting to come back... :) Random thoughts are a good start!

The Duo Is Split Up!

So, I'm missing my "other half." Liz has been sent to train the new-hire batch at a different location while I get to stay here for re-training techs already on the floor. It has been a hard adjustment coming to work all alone for the past few days! Everyone here at Tidel Park has seen us together since the beginning, so they are all asking me if Liz is ok and if she's ever coming back. (We're hoping she will when she finishes the batch in another couple of weeks!) They also think that we are incomplete unless we're together; I suppose because we were always introduced around as, "This is Liz and Lori, our American trainers"-no distinguishing between us. (Pretty funny when you see us-she's taller, with curly blond hair and I'm shorter, with straight dark hair.) I've been filling her in with news from here-telling her that most of the regular security guards have asked me where she is, why she's not with me, and when she's coming back. The other day, though, she texted me to tell me that one of our regular cab drivers asked her about me-even they are wondering! (Yes, you may think it strange that we text each other, but when your shifts start 4 hours apart you are rarely awake and in the apartment at the same time.) I guess as a duo, we made quite an impression!

Celebrating American Independence Day in India

It has been a rough week here. For some reason, the reality of living cross-culturally has been hitting me hard this week. It wears you out and sucks the life out of you-even to the point where walking down the street to recharge my phone was too much of an effort. I didn't have the energy to work at communicating with people who only speak some English. I'm tired of having to run to the bathroom every half an hour. (Need more Immodium!!!) Going anywhere is too much of an effort because of having to bargain with the autorickshaw drivers and then the shopkeepers themselves and then still wondering if I paid too much. Not knowing how much extra time to factor in when someone says "I'll be there in 10 minutes." Then, on top of all that, there is the self-condemnation of "You shoudn't take things so hard!" "You should have more patience!" "What are you doing here if you can't accept/deal with these things?" Yikes! Deep down I know it's a phase of living cross-culturally and that things will get better-just living through it now is hard!

So, with this all in mind, I was eagerly looking forward to the American Indpendence Day Celebration put on by the American Chamber of Commerce, the American Consulate General and the Taj Hotel group on Sunday. It was held at Taj Fisherman's Cove-which is roughly halfway down ECR (East Coast Road) between Chennai and Mahabs. I had two-no actually three-goals: 1.) To eat a REAL hamburger 2.) To see fireworks, and 3.) To RELAX!!!!! (Well, actually, a side goal was not to get hit by another cow while traveling down that road again....!) :) Fisherman's Cove is a beautiful resort (as are all the Taj Hotels that I've seen!) and it was good to get away with people I like to hang out with! It was a really nice event-family oriented with games and contests for both the children and the adults, lots of prizes, and lots of food. Unfortunately, the hamburgers were not so good. However, the hot dogs were decent. (They are also hard to come by here...) Liz enjoyed the potato salad, Patricia the potato wedges and I the fries. We missed the the fireworks while we were having a cocktail in the lounge. :( But it was a nice, relaxing evening.... I guess one out of three isn't bad! :) (And we managed to avoid any collisions with the livestock!) :)

Independence Day

Happy 4th of July to everyone back in the states! Have a good but safe weekend!

Missing you all...

Can't wait to hear about the Gravel Ponds picnic...I'll be missing the fireworks display there! :)

I've Got Mail!

Ok I've been here, what 2 1/2 months so far, and just yesterday I figured out where the mailboxes for the apartment are. :) Now this is not exactly my fault-when I first arrived here someone that helped set me up in my apartment told me that they would bring the mail inside and either slip it under the door or leave it stuck in the gate. In my jet-lagged state, this seemed reasonable to me so I just accepted it. (I must admit, I wondered what the small, unmarked key on the key ring they handed me was, but I assumed that I would figure that out in time.) :) And, to confirm this statement, several envelopes (usually bills) were slipped under the door at various times. But, then I heard that people from the US had sent me mail that had never appeared under my door. I was a little worried, but I still never even thought of asking about the mailboxes! :) But, yesterday I decided to do something about it. I had our friend, who often acts as our translator, ask the security guards about it and, lo and behold, there ARE mailboxes for the apartment complex...and, the small, unmarked key DOES open the one for our apartment. :) :) :) Geez, sometimes I wonder if I really am cut out for this cross-cultural experience!

Anyway, thanks to those that have sent me mail so far-it makes me feel so loved! :)

Criticism

According to m-w.com:

Main Entry: crit·i·cism: 1 a : the act of criticizing usually unfavorably b : a critical observation or remark c : CRITIQUE 2 : the art of evaluating or analyzing works of art or literature

I did not create this blog to start a debate over the pros or cons of one culture over another. (If you have doubts about this, please read the About section of my blog!) Like it or not, these are my experiences here and my personal interpretation of the same. While I'm flattered, Mr./Ms. Anonymous, that you love my blog and choose to comment on it, if I may say so, you may want to work on your interpretive tone for reading. The posts that I write are usually written with a light, humerous tone, which is often poking fun at my responses to culture-clash situations. This blog is not about promoting the superiority of one culture over another, merely to highlight the differences and similarities that I experience. You may want to go back and re-read and re-assess. If you choose to "criticize" my blog in the future, I would appreciate it if you would stick to actual criticizm, as defined by Merriam-Webster, and not to bland generalizations or assumptions of me personally.

Holy Cow!

I was wondering how long it would be before I had a reason to use this title.... :)

Ok so maybe it wasn't the smartest idea to convince my friend to drive down to Mahabalipuram on a bike. Mahabalipuram is about an hour and half away-a bit of a long drive, but the weather was nice (much cooler than it has been recently) so I thought it would be ok. I wanted to check out the Community Development Center that Vineyard runs there. They have been looking for volunteers to teach conversational English there, but it has been hard for me to commit while working nights. But finally, I decided to give it a try...

It all seemed to start out smoothly, despite the fact that it was morning and we had both just gotten off night shifts. Smoothly, that is, until we got HIT BY THE COW!!!! The thing was trying to cross the road in front of us. My friend (who is a very safe driver, let me assure you) swerved left to miss it at about the same time it decided to speed up to try to get out of the road. It knocked right into us-luckily we didn't fall-but both of our legs scraped against it. OUCH! It hurt me, so I have to believe it hurt my friend, who took the brunt of it, even more. We didn't end up stopping, but both of us later admitted to looking back and seeing the thing twitching on the side of the road. :(

So, we were a little shook up by the time we got to the Community Development Center and met people there. Despite that, I was really excited about what they are doing there. Basically, they are working primarily with children of fishermen with special emphasis on the children of widows. They support these children in their studies at the local schools-whether by providing tutoring classes or money towards uniforms or even food for the family to eat before the children head off to school. I'm very excited about helping out in whatever way I can there. Next week, I think I'll be taking a class there. (This terminology actually means that I will be teaching there.) The future vision is for them to open their own school, with their own fee structure, so that they can accept whichever students they choose.

Luckily, the trip home was much less traumatic than the trip down. That particular cow was no longer lying by the side of the road. But it still seemed, to me at least, that the rest of the cows were out to get us. (Of course, I was probably paranoid by this point in time!) I tensed up each time we saw one by the side of the road. (Which, you may imagine, is pretty frequent here...)

Culture Clash #1

Now no one will let us make coffee on our own. Everytime I even mention to any of our friends that I'm even thinking about making coffee, they immediately offer to come over and make it for us. I wonder why... :) I'm sure our maid, at least, appreciates it...

So, tell me, why aren't Indians used to waiting in line? I mean, I knew this from before, but I still don't understand why there is this difference. For example, today when Liz and I got to work, we stopped to get coffee in the cafeteria. We're standing in line behind the person in front of us, giving a normal (American) distance between us and him. Apparantly, that was too far because some other guy came up and placed himself directly in front of us. Now, this is not the first time that something like this has happened to us, so we weren't too surprised and pushed our way past to our original place in line, but it does make me wonder again what the root cause is. This is also apparant in observing the traffic flow all over the country. For those who don't know, at any red light in India, you stop, and then any vehicle that can will crowd around and past you to fill up any available space-any concept of individual lanes is gone.

In America, this is interpreted as rude behavior, but in India it is accepted behavior. Why this difference? Where does the difference develop from?

For the Love of Coffee...

Ok back to stories...

This afternoon, after we woke up, Liz decided it was time to experiment with the new coffeemaker. We've had the coffeemaker since the time we got our dishes, but what with "filter coffee" being so readily available here in South India, we hadn't actually gotten around to using it. I'm sure an instruction manual actually came with the thing, but somehow in the mess of unpacking everything it has disappeared... So, first there was the debate about how much water to how much coffee to use. (In terms of American coffee, we were a little off-it was a bit strong!) Liz was all focused on how to tell when it was finished cuz the carafe is metal instead of glass (so you can't see when it's done dripping.) Meanwhile, one of our friends and I were busy trying to figure out how much milk we would need to warm up for our three cups of coffee. (Of course warming the milk is a foreign concept to us Americans, but what can you do?-gotta please the Indian guys...) :) Anyway, we collected all the disparate parts needed...and began the assembly process. Liz led out first, but put in too much coffee and sugar for the milk and managed to spill it out into the saucer. She then thought that the best (?) plan would be to 'mix' it by pouring it back and forth between two mugs. [This is not as strange as it may sound-it is the common way the coffee-wallahs (sellers) mix the coffee when you order it here.] However, apparantly it requires a fair amount of practice or genetic disposition to do this without spilling all over the counter! (i.e. Liz should NOT become a coffee-wallah at any point in life!) While she was doing this, our friend and I mixed our own coffees safely with a spoon. Well, safely until I managed to knock my cup completely out of the saucer and all over the counter and floor. *sigh* I had just got the proportions right too...

I'm sure most of you are thinking (hoping!) that this is the end of the story...but no...it continues on... :)

As our friend and I were changing the water jug in the dispenser, Liz, deciding that her coffee still needed sugar, picked up the sugar canister and managed to drop it over the entire kitchen floor. I'm still not exactly sure how... YUCK! (Especially where it mixed with the coffee splotches already on the floor!) Unfortunately, our maid had already left for the day, so Liz and I were running around trying to get the mess cleaned up as quickly as possible so that we could get showered and dressed and ready for our cab to the office (which we expected in the next 45 minutes or so.) ACK! All this while we were laughing hysterically and trying to drink the remaining coffee. :) Nothing but good times in our apartment!

We did manage a sweeping and two moppings and to get ready before they called to say that the cab had arrived. Phew! Now we're just wondering if the ant colony that we had managed to (mostly) banish will have moved in again by the time we get back from work.... *crossing fingers*

I think we should stick to just buying coffee from the coffee-wallahs for a bit more time... Although probably this story emphasizes how much we actually NEEDED the coffee at that time... :)

Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants

So I went to buy a new pair of jeans here in India. Let me first say that I'd have to rank buying new jeans (in general, not only in India) right up there with buying a new swimsuit or buying new bras-two of my least favorite experiences of being a woman. *sigh* Am I alone in this?

In the US, I had a system: walk into Old Navy; pick out the low-rise, boot cut jeans in whatever color I liked; buy them and walk out of the store without having to go through the pain of trying them on. However, I didn't plan well enough before I left and I ended up in India with only two pairs of jeans. One quickly developed a hole in the butt and the other a hole in the knee, which perpetuated the need for the jeans shopping trip. Unfortunately, there is nowhere to buy Old Navy brand jeans, so I knew from the beginning that I would have to try on at least a few pairs to find a style I could live with. I hardly knew where to start-Pepe Jeans, Levis, Lee, Wranglers (do they still sell these in the US?) ACK! I have no idea what will fit properly! Then, to make matters worse, it isn't based on a numerical size like in the US, but on your waist size. Luckily I got measured for my bridesmaid's dress recently or else I would have no clue where to begin. :) Of course I couldn't find anything that I liked at the first store we stopped at, but finally at the second one I found a pair in a color I liked that fit well...except for the length of the pants. BUT-TII (This Is India) [I think this might be the first time I'm saying it without an accompanying sigh and exasperated shake of the head!] Here you can get things altered to fit you perfectly! Tada-the search is over! For at least one night... :)

Trying Really Hard To Like India

Ok Liz came across this article, so I'll pass it on to the rest of you. Be sure to read Thursday and Friday's entries so that you can understand some of the allure of India. Don't focus just on the first few days! And check out the slide shows so that you understand why, when I came back in January, I said I want to retire to Kerela.

http://slate.msn.com/id/2107063/entry/2107071/

Lori Rants!

I have been inspired by my friend Jay's blog (Sorry, Jay-had to do it!) to also write about my thoughts and feelings and not just anecdotal stories about life here-though I'm not sure if it will actually be ranting. It's probably better that I don't have regular access to a computer on the weekends-that's when I tend to get more philosophical. It's also when I tend to miss home the most, which I find a little strange. I guess it's because during the week a good chunk of time is taken up by work and I don't have time to think about the people and activities I'm missing back home. But the weekends, even when I'm out doing stuff with people here, I'm wishing that I could share my experiences with people back home. The weekends generally have been a little tough in that way.

This past Sunday, the pastor at Vineyard was talking about knowing your purpose. It was good to be reminded that I do have a purpose...and somehow being here in India is part of that...I still wish I knew exactly how it all fits in. I guess the same questions that were running through my head back in the States are plaguing me here: what is my purpose? why am I here (specifically here in India, not the general why am I here on earth?) how does this all fit together?

Hmmm...who knew that I could actually share my feelings online...that's so unlike me! :)

Idhu Romebo Karam

"This is too spicy"...for all the non-Tamil speakers. :)

I'm learning Tamil as necessity dictates. :) Today, our cook made the spiciest thing that I've eaten thus far-some shrimp curry thing. Whew! It was too hot! Just eating a plate full made my eyes water and my nose run. Liz was blowing her nose and panting as well. :) Yikes!

Luckily, our cook realized (She doesn't speak enough English for us to actually tell her.) that something was wrong and started apologizing and picking out the shrimp for us to eat apart from the sauce. I think that she's been slowly increasing the spice level in our food each day, but our attempt to tell her that we were approaching our limit was unsuccessful. (Thanks, Raghu!) :)

It's too bad because what I could taste of it, before my taste buds were fried, was really good! I could write something disparing about how I think I'll never adjust to Indian culture and the spiciness of the food, but I know that it was even spicy by Indian standards. (Thanks to the two who tried out some of her cooking and declared it spicy!) This makes me feel better-that I'm not just the white girl who can't handle spices! :) :)

Work

Ok, so I figured that I should probably tell a little about what I actually do here at work.... :)

After the tutor training, there was a little bit of a hiring freeze, which meant no new batches to teach, so the American trainers were all sent out to observe the various programs, week by week. It was good because it helped us understand more of the dynamics of the BPO business. The first week Liz and I observed at Dell and the second week we observed at Symantec. During observations, we were able to listen and give feedback to agents on calls as well as sit in on a few re-training and new hire classes. (For agents that had already been through the communications training.) It was good to visit and meet people at both processes.

Then, the third week, we were both sent back to Dell to actually help out with some communication re-training. Our schedules were changing daily and it was a little hard to keep up with everything. (Including sleep!) :) But, now things have settled down a bit. We are both working the 7PM to 4AM shift. My assignment is to monitor the agents who have low customer satisfaction assesments and then schedule and perform training sessions with them. I spent last week trying to figure out how the monitoring systems work and finding out what information I could get from which department here. :) So, we'll see how this week goes with actually training some people.

The Life of Luxury...well at least a taste of it!

Liz and I treated ourselves to pedicures and manicures at our local beauty parlor this week. Actually "treated" is a bit of a misnomer. Each procedure cost us 100 rupies (roughly $2.50 USD) quite a difference from the $30 or so it would cost me back home. :) This is actually our second trip, but the salon we went to last time was close to the guest house where she was originally staying. We decided that it was a must to find one close to our apartment, so we visited the Lovely Beauty Parlor. :) (What a name!) I have decided that I love getting pedicures! The manicures are nice, but there's just something relaxing about soaking your feet, then having someone massage and scrub them for you. :) And after wearing sandals and walking around quite a bit, it feels so nice!!!! I highly recommend them! In fact, I think I could get used to getting one regularly. Who knew coming to India would change me into a high maintenance girl!?!? :)